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5 Movie-Based Theme Park Rides with Disturbing Implications

5 Movie-Based Theme Park Rides with Disturbing Implications

We often rely on theme park attractions to provide rich, rewarding narrative foundations for movies– but sometimes it works the other way, and movies are actually adapted into theme park attractions. Some of these adaptations, when viewed within the context of the films that they inspired, have profoundly disturbing implications… 5. Jurassic Park: The Ride–...

7 Follow-Ups to Classic Christmas Movies That Ruin the Original

While we may have accepted that Indiana Jones met some aliens, or that Francis Ford Coppola cast his daughter in the third Godfather movie, we demand more from our Christmas movies and specials. Unfortunately, many classic Christmas movie characters nevertheless returned for follow-ups that denigrate the original, thus ruining Christmas. If this was a TV...

6 DIE HARD Rip-Offs That Time Forgot

In the early to mid-nineties, it seemed as though almost every action movie imitated Die Hard to some extent. Several movies straight-up lifted the Die Hard premise (one person in one location against a slew of bad guys) adapting it to a variety of locations: a boat in Under Siege, a hockey arena in Sudden...

5 Disneyland TV Specials (That Are Completely Insane)

There’s always been something inherently insane about Disneyland and Disney World— think about it, why would anyone willingly visit a castle owned by a rodent in a land populated mainly by cartoon characters and robot presidents? The new film Escape From Tomorrow purports to portray a unique vision of Disney World, one that’s dark and...

5 Things You Might Not Know About EERIE, INDIANA

In conjunction with this week’s podcast about Eerie, Indiana we’ve compiled five facts that you may not know about the cult show: 5. Tobey Maguire Played a Ghost Before Tobey Maguire learned the Cider House Rules (which were about abortion or something) or re-invigorated then later ruined Spider-Man, he starred in an episode of Eerie,...

5 Mortal Kombat Tie-In Products (That Nobody Needed)

Back in the mid-’90s, Mortal Kombat was bigger than the Beatles, who were bigger than Jesus. So I guess, Mortal Kombat was bigger than Jesus. In any case, along with this success came merchandising, from the movie version, which we talk about on this week’s podcast, to a bunch of other shitty and unnecessary products....

Top 5 Underrated Jurassic Park Characters

With the IMAX re-release in full-swing, and this week’s discussion of it on the podcast, we’ve decided to pay tribute to those Jurassic Park characters who don’t get the same love as spotlight-hoggers like Alan Grant, or Ian Malcolm. These are the unsung heroes of the classic film, our Top 5 Underrated Jurassic Park Characters: 5. Gerry Harding (the...

Top 5 Pop-Culture Characters Who Are Secretly Jesus

With tomorrow’s podcast reflecting the more secular bunny-worshiping aspect of Easter, with a discussion of Who Framed Roger Rabbit, we decided our Top 5 list should be a bit more pious. Hence, we have complied a list of our Top 5 Pop-Culture Characters Who Are Secretly Jesus– 5 actors who portrayed the son of God, then...

Top 5 Post-Military Career Paths (According to Action Movies)

In anticipation of Thursday’s show about Under Siege, in which an ex-Navy Seal becomes a cook, we’ve decided to count down our favourite career paths for ex-military action movie characters. 5. Drifting (as seen in Hard Target, First Blood) If a shaggy-haired drifter comes to your town, whatever you do, don’t pick a fight with...

Top 5 Least-Threatening Movie Dinosaurs

In anticipation of Thursday’s show, in which we discuss The Land Before Time, we’ve decided to rank our Top 5 Least-Threatening Movie Dinosaurs (because we’re adults, and we can spend our time however we like). Note: We didn’t include any of the characters from The Land Before Time, because we’ll be talking a lot about them on the...

Top 5 Secret Shakespeare Adaptations (That Tricked You Into Learning)

In anticipation of tomorrow’s show in which we discuss Baz Luhrmann’s William Shakespeare’s Romeo + Juliet, we’ve decided to count down our Top 5 Secret Shakespeare Adaptations. These are movies in which the Bard got the shaft, and was denied a motion picture credit, thus ruining his career in show business. 5. The Lion King...

Top 5 Underrated Santa Clauses

With Christmas just around the corner, and our episode devoted to Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer coming this Thursday (look for it on iTunes), we’ve decided to salute our Top 5 Underrated Santa Clauses. Sure Miracle on 34th Street was great, but stop hogging the spotlight Edmund Gwenn, give some other Santas a chance! 5. Douglas...